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Here I Am

by Ben Travis

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1.
Here I Am 05:04
Here I Am Ben Travis © 2000 I had life in a box I kept it in the palm of my hand Nobody could tell me anything I didn’t already understand But now my little box has grown Can’t even fit it in my room To tell the truth, it’s not a box anymore It’s more like a big, expanding balloon (chorus) Here I am… don’t even know what I used to know Staring at the stars and scratching my head Can’t even sleep when I’m in my bed Here I am… throwing off the mask of certainty Smiling at the kid I used to be And wondering what the future holds for a man like me Milk and cookies by the stairs Waiting for the man in red to appear Down the chimney any minute now Sure hope I’ve been a good boy this year But now my Santa Claus has gone So tell me what am I to do? If all those presents weren’t from him Maybe what they told me just isn’t true (to chorus) “Just close your eyes and believe That feeling of wonder goes away” But if it’s okay with you I think I’m gonna just let it stay (to chorus)
2.
The Story of Our Lives ©May 7, 2012 Ben Travis (verse 1) Every night I lie in bed and I wonder what’s the point of it all We work so hard to learn and grow but everything we do just seems so small (chorus) And so we work and slave to get the bills paid then we fall into bed at night And then as fast as we can we do it again and that’s the story of our lives (verse 2) Every day we drive far away where we’re needed desperately We go through the motions and fit in our place but inside we’re longing to be free (final chorus) And so we work and slave till our hair turns grey but it ain’t so black and white We run and we run to get it all done and that’s the story of our lives
3.
Crying to Be Free © 2000 Ben Travis (verse 1) Sometimes life is funny Sometimes life is sad Sometimes life can break your heart or make you mad Sometimes life is lonely No one understands Sometimes you look up to the sky and wring your hands Sometimes you are helpless Sometimes you are strong Sometimes you don't know right from left or right from wrong Sometimes you look in the mirror You like what you see But sometimes the person looking back at you is crying to be free... Crying to be free... Crying to be free (verse 2) You used to like roller coasters When you were a kid But sometimes life makes you more queasy than they ever did Spinning 'round in circles All day long today You hear some preacher preachin' about a better way When did you arrive here? It's not the life you planned You always thought you'd end up in the Promised Land Yesterday you locked your heart up Now you can't find the key All the while something inside you is crying to be free... crying to be free... crying to be free Sometimes life is funny Sometimes life is sad Sometimes life can break your heart or make you mad
4.
The Rainbow Serpent © 2000 Ben Travis When I look across the plains I see a thousand stars Every time I close my eyes I know I'm where I belong 'Cause I hear my friend the kookabura call And I hear the wind tonight It's singing me a song (chorus) And the Rainbow Serpent comes To call my name And the earth my mother Brings a smile And the way I feel tonight With this bamboo on my lips Must be the reason I am here at all When I look into the trees I see a thousand eyes Every one I call my friend They share the same land as I Sometimes I call my tribe To join me in a song But sometimes I climb the hills And play my songs alone [to chorus] I can't remember ever needing More than what I carry with me Now inside my pack Placed here upon my back [to chorus]
5.
Funny Feelin’ © 2000 Ben Travis, Amanda Davis Can't hardly sleep at night I think my bed is made of stone And in the daytime, I hold a cardboard sign And stand beneath the bridge I call my home I watch the passing cars I've learned to count the hours 'till darkness brings the bitter cold (bridge) I can see them waiting for the light to turn green Trying not to let me catch their eye I know that as they drive away They will do their level best To forget that I'm alive (chorus) It's a funny feelin' Knowing no one in the world Would trade places with you if they could It's a funny feelin' Being awake is just like dreamin' 'Cause the nightmare never ends, It just goes on... And you're always alone When I left for the war I thought I'd be a hero But when I got back, they gave me no awards In fact, they gave me no respect at all Truth be known This city is much worse Than any jungle I ever saw (bridge 2) I can hear them saying I should just get a job Telling me what they think I should do I wonder as they drive away What they think that I should say When I'm in my interview With tattered clothes and homemade shoes [to chorus] People come along and hand me Bibles They tell me Jesus loves me And forgives me of my sin But for me there's something more important than my soul's revival I'm wondering when this cold front's gonna end [to chorus]
6.
Preconceptions © 2000 Ben Travis (verse 1) We are all fed our beliefs from the womb like mashed carrots on a spoon Though we defend them valiantly sometimes they fall like scales around us and lie useless at our feet Still we find our preconceptions grinning at us from dark corners Clawing at our hearts Envying our freedom (chorus) And we learn to dance to the rhythm we hear as the wind shakes the trees and our shadows grow longer We tip our hats to the past that has shaped us and poke our canes into the blackness ahead (verse 2) Though we are satisfied with questions the voices around us cry for certainty Strangely enough, they often find it yet we remain unconvinced and this is unacceptable There are times when we'd trade our souls for some black and white But we trudge on silently Through the endless sea of grays [to chorus] Like pieces of a puzzle that has no solution the fragments of truth that we see wink at us knowingly [to chorus]
7.
You Get the Worst of Me ©May 1, 2012 Ben Travis (verse 1) All day long I gotta be who they expect me to be I gotta play the role… maintain control and do it gracefully but when I come home and we’re all alone and there is no one else that I’m supposed to be baby, I apologize but I fear so many times you get the worst of me (verse 2) Every time… I start it fine as I go out the door but later on… when the day is long I just can’t give any more but when I walk in and my day’s at an end and even though it’s the first time I can be free baby, I apologize but it seems so many times you get the worst of me (coda) There are times when I am so sure that I’m only running on a treadmill through my life but then I look into your eyes but when I come home and we’re all alone and there is no one else that I’m supposed to be baby, I apologize but I know so many times you get the worst of me baby, I apologize but I know it’s no surprise you get the worst of me
8.
I Stand Alone (c)2005 Ben Travis/Mohammed Ifrine I know the sound of each rock and stone Only the lights of me are welcome here Everything breathes, and I know each breath I keep myself protected from pain I don't entertain a moment's fear I feel the rain, and ignore the rest Don't come any closer, don't even rise I've felt all the pain, and heard all the lies In my world, there's no compromise I watch the Sun dance in the sky I hear the wind whisper my name Emptiness calls, but I turn away Moving along without a sound playing a cruel, but honest game Searching the sky, I see only gray Don't come any closer, don't even rise I've felt all the pain, and heard all the lies In my world, there's no compromise Like every tree stands on its own reaching for the sky, I stand alone I share my world with no one else All by myself, I stand alone
9.
Thirty-nine 05:06
Thirty-nine © March 11, 2010 Ben Travis for Granny I’m sick, I’m tired I’m uninspired I never pictured life this way I’m far from home and all alone and all my friends have gone away My mind is weak and cloudy now it hasn’t always been this way I once was known for wit and style and not the bitter way I feel today and if you’d asked me when I was twenty-five I might have told you that I felt so alive but now it’s hard to find a reason to wear this fool’s disguise There was a time when life was kind and every breath was fresh and new My heart was full of dreams and obligations the fantasies of youth and if you’d asked me when I was thirty-nine I might have told you that life was so divine but now it’s hard to see a reason to wear this fool’s disguise And all those times I told myself that I would never end this way but there’s no exit sign, or finish line no final words to say and if you ask me now that I am ninety-three if I can tell you the way things used to be you’ll forgive me if I ask you to go and let me be
10.
The Rain Falls © 2000 Ben Travis I think the world is a lonely place We all look for ways to make it more like home We put pictures on the wall But it doesn't help at all Still the rain falls So much hunger, so much war Yet so little I can do So I sit on my couch at home Grab the remote control See what's on While the rain falls... A little girl hears her father say, "I wish you'd never been born at all" And as she walks back to her room Well, she wishes it too Still the rain falls... A woman comes to work with bruises on her face She says, "I fell down again." And as the pieces fall apart I know the bruises on her face match the ones on her heart while the rain falls... The rain falls... The rain falls... Can you hear the rain fall? Can you hear the rain fall? It’s falling on the ones who have no one to love It’s falling on the starving children It’s falling on the ones, the ones who have no hope The ones who suffer at the hands of others The ones who feel afraid at night And it’s falling on the ones The ones who think they’ve got it all right
11.
When I come to the end of my rope © 2000 Ben Travis When I come to the end of my rope Will there be anything to hold onto? When I come to the end of my rope Will there be anyone to hold onto? When I come to the end of my travels Will there be anyone to come home to? When I come to the end of my travels Will there be anyone to belong to? When I find myself, you'll be the first to know When I know myself, you'll be the first one I find When I come to the end of my rope Will there be anyone to protect me? When I come to the end of my rope Will there be anyone who can save me? When I find myself on the edge of the horizon When I find myself in the footsteps of mankind When I come to the end of my rope Will there be anyone to hold onto? When I come to the end of my rope Will there be anyone to belong to?
12.
Song for Maia © 2010 Ben Travis I can’t believe my eyes you were just a dream, and now you’re real I know you won’t remember this day but I will your tiny hands and tiny feet your eyes looking up at me this old piano I play now for you (chorus) it’s a song for Maia and I hope you like it ‘cause this is the first song I’ve played for you it’s a song for Maia to tell you that I love you to let you know I’ll be there this song is just for you and now to my surprise you have helped me see a brighter day a world so often cold has now been warmed by your smile and I am humbled here that you could find some comfort in my arms that you could find delight in my eyes mystifies me

about

We all have a story, a journey all our own. This album is my attempt to document my own journey through music. My hope is that, as you listen, you will find that our paths are in many ways the same.

This album is the culmination of over 10 years of songwriting inspired by changes in the way I see the world. My hope is that this album challenges listeners to examine their preconceptions about the world and think for themselves. Musically, I explored rock, jazz, Latin, and the introspective singer/piano-player style of the artists that have inspired me: Elton John, Sting and Billy Joel. Each song expresses a unique part of the process I went through as I found out what made sense to me when I looked at life in a fresh way. I brought in some amazing Nashville musicians such as Roy Vogt, Andrew Henderson, Chris Gregg, and Sam Kallaos to help make this an album I could truly be proud of. And I am. I hope you enjoy it..

I grew up in a small town in Kentucky called Dawson Springs, and learned to play the piano by watching my dad play. I then attended Belmont University in Nashville, TN, and graduated with a degree in vocal composition in 1996. I continue to record and perform my own music while balancing that with a career as a teacher. My influences include Elton John, Billy Joel, and Sting.

Thank you for listening. I truly appreciate it.

credits

released September 10, 2013

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Ben Travis Nashville, Tennessee

I’m a Nashville-based audio engineer and producer. I work primarily with singer/songwriters and bands with original music to help them create a musical product they can be proud of without paying the prices of major studios.

I'm also an independent artist and songwriter. My music invites listeners to think and ask meaningful questions about the world around them.
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